So, Mother's Day sucks, and a think a large number of people who read this blog will be inclined to agree. It hurts, it's sad, it blows a big fat fatty.
Do we love our mothers? Well yes! We do, we love them a lot. Thank you, mom and mother-in-law, for birthing us, we are sure that sucked a lot (although neither of us would know from experience, obviously) and thank you for all of the bullshit you've had to endure over the past few decades. And we're sorry for the following things: the times we yelled "PICK MY BOOGER!!!!!" in public, told our teacher that dad called the dog Peter Draggin because he had short legs, said that we got our haircolor from the milk man. And also for the time you made that delicious corn casserole, and we snuck out of the house and dumped it in the yard so it looked like we ate it. Sorry for all of that. Really.
Since I did recently "out" myself by sending my blog URL out to the masses, maybe I should illustrate the pure suckage of Mother's Day to those reading now who are so fertile they can just look at a man and become pregnant. In list form, because I love lists, and I think this list can put the fatty suckage into perspective.
Jen's Top Ten List of Things That Suck
1. Asian Bird Flu
2. Mother's Day*
3. Paying Taxes
4. Close Talkers
5. Times I Fell Down (In Public)
6. Biting Into Fatty Chicken
7. The Word Panties
8. Onion Body Odor
9. Cotton Balls
10. Pink Eye
Please Note: This list is subject to change on a minute-by-minute basis.
*Click here for more profoundness...