Monday, January 5, 2009

32 Weeks: Where is this pregnancy measuring stick?

And can I poke you in the eye with it? Or possibly just shove it up your ass?

I had my first shower this weekend, and it was fantastic! We got so much stuff for the baby, and it really was a lot of fun. Cupcake is a lucky, lucky girl. We have two entire closets full of baby stuff and another shower next weekend. I'd say we're ready! I can't believe how generous people are! We had lots of cupcake things there and it was so cute. I even got a set of cupcake pajamas and robe just for me.

The comments about the bigness are really, really annoying. Not the, "Oh, your belly is growing and you look cute" comments. But the, "Wow, you look huge, and I just saw you a few weeks ago and you looked huge then but NOW?! I know I asked before but really, are you having twins? Because you are huge. Did I say that already?" And the more subtle but equally rude, "Do they think you'll go a little early based on your size?" And my favorite - asking for proof that the string used to judge the How Big is Jen's Belly Game is actually my belly because it looks way too small and there is now way that it would fit around THAT hoss of a mother-to-be.*

Nothing like feeling like you are at your roast instead of your baby shower! I can fake amusement at the first few "jokes," but I reach my limit at three and then just start to be rude back. So mature, I am. Always bringing it with the maturity. Luckily my mom and sisters-in-law were there to help me keep my sanity, and to laugh at all my snark.

I don't see why it's a shock that I am big at 32 WEEKS PREGNANT. As in EIGHT OUT OF NINE MONTHS PREGNANT. I'd like to see the yardstick that people are using to make their judgments on pregnancy size. I'd like to see it. And hold it. And swat at people with it. Maybe poke some people in the eye with it. Possibly whack a few shins. Stuff like that.

But! 32 Weeks! 33 Weeks tomorrow, actually. And since I am diabetic and speshul, I get to go to the doctor again tomorrow, and every week to have my glucose monitored. A true overachiever in the OB department. My fasting glucose levels were waaaay too high, even though they fell within the range given to me by the dietitian. I'm just too sweet. (Except when I am hitting people with yardsticks.)

I ended up being put on Glyburide by a hilarious new (and very good looking) doctor who won me over by telling a boob joke. I would totally tell the boob joke, because it was funny, but it had to do with someones last name being like our last name, and that is just way too Google-able for me. But it was funny, and now poor Mark will have to sit through appointments with this new hot funny male doctor as apposed to his beloved hot Suzie. (He will probably live.)

Cupcake was measuring right on time, so the doctor didn't think that I was growing the female Stay Puft Marshmallow Man. Or, not yet, as he said. Very comforting. My belly measured at 32 centimeters, which is right on for 32 weeks. And I have gained 19 pounds, which is the same as the past few weeks, but nobody seems worried so neither am I.

I've read about 40 katrillion blogs about new years resolutions. So, how are we all doing on the new years resolution front? I didn't resolve, so I am doing great! It's a no fail plan, really. I just set the bar so low that it is impossible for me to underachieve.

Be honest - how many of you have fudged just a little already?

*The best part of this story is that the person who was brave enough to say it, was also brave enough to put it around her waist as proof that lo! The string is too small! Her waist was the same size as mine, not pregnant. So, I win, I think.

28 comments:

Seriously? - Erin said...

You totally win that one.

I too am growing tired of the OH MY GOD comments. Yesterday I dropped something off at my MILs house, my SIL says OH MY GOT YOU GOT SO BIG SINCE I SAW YOU. She saw me Christmas Eve.

I almost wanted to comment that I bet I still weigh less than her :) Mean I know but two years ago she went from a 6 to a 12 in six months and she wasn't pregnant.

I am glad you had fun at your shower!

Anabelle said...

hahaha gotta love the big belly remarks. if it makes you feel better I don't think you look huge at all..I think you look perfectly averagely pregnant.

I think its because your so petite...

lets see, I have stuck to my new years resolution thus far, in that i have not eaten carbs since the 1st... I feel like eating a loaf of bread's legs off...

bethkyle said...

I bet she felt like an arse! LOL

I think you look normal. I am due tomorrow and I feel gynormous, but I know I could be bigger - so I am not complaining.

Red Headed Mama said...

Yes, I would say you win. Definitely.

I'm doing okay with my resolutions. One doesn't start until after Aiden's party, I decided it best that way, or I'd have to scratch that one already (eating better)

alison said...

Bahaha, you totally win! I still don't think you look like you're going to birth a dinosaur or whatever everyone else is saying. And I think your 31 week belly picture looked almost identical to my 31 week belly. Don't listen to them, you look great. Cupcake needs all that space. And soon enough you'll be back to being itty bitty and. :)

No resolutions for me either, look at us be matchy.

Courtney said...

I seriously hope that lady really didnt call you a hoss! Fuc*#ng bi**h if she did. But whatever cause you showed her!!

I think you look great and when I am 32/33 weeks I hope I look as cute as you do!

Emily said...

Ha! I love the way that story ends! You look beautiful!!

Of course your sugar is high - you are gestating a cupcake after all! ;)

I can't believe it is 32 weeks already! Wow!

Mary said...

I, like you, have gained 19 pounds total. This weekend I went to dinner with two friends I hadn't seen since September. One greeted me with "oh my god, it's enormous." The other chimed in: "When are you due?" I said March 4. He said: "Does it get bigger?"

When you're finished with that yardstick, can I borrow it?

Chicago Mom said...

Hi there - I've been following your blog for awhile now but I haven't posted a comment. I found you thru "The Making of a Family" blog.

First of all, you look GREAT. You are just tiny in stature so your belly will more obvious than on a giant tall person like me. I am 14 weeks pregnant and I'm already getting the rude comments too about how "big" I am. It's hard not to reply, "I'm pregnant. What's your excuse?" But instead I just look at them and don't say a word. It's very uncomfortable, but they get the hint.

Don't let the ignorant, jealous haters get you down!! Negative comments come from JEALOUSY. Always remember that little Jen. :)

Chicago Mom said...

Hi there - I've been following your blog for awhile now but I haven't posted a comment. I found you thru "The Making of a Family" blog.

First of all, you look GREAT. You are just tiny in stature so your belly will more obvious than on a giant tall person like me. I am 14 weeks pregnant and I'm already getting the rude comments too about how "big" I am. It's hard not to reply, "I'm pregnant. What's your excuse?" But instead I just look at them and don't say a word. It's very uncomfortable, but they get the hint.

Don't let the ignorant, jealous haters get you down!! Negative comments come from JEALOUSY. Always remember that little Jen. :)

momofonefornow said...

So, I just looked at your 31 week belly shot and I think you look about 31 weeks pregnant. Not sure what is up with all the crappy comments. I think you look super cute and pregnant!

You need to get a shirt made that says, "No, it's not twins, I am measuring correctly, and you may NOT touch it!"

CJ said...

LOL - You totally won that one! I'd say it was probably worth it!

I gained over 40 pounds when I was pregnant. I looked like a house. But then I was chatting with another new mom at a Christmas party recently, and she said she gained over 70 pounds! (And she's a small person.) She hated being pregnant and said she will adopt if they want a second child, it was that traumatic. So I'm not feeling so bad now.

L. said...

Okay, I'll just put this out there. I don't totally get the offense over the big belly comments. (It would be offensive if someone talked about you gaining weight. But I think when people just say "big" to a pregnant woman, they just mean the belly.) I think people usually mean it as a compliment. You're growing a big baby! That's good! And it's amazing what the body can do.

Okay, I do get that it's a bit much if someone asks if you are having twins, or goes on and on about how huge you are. I guess it's a fine line and maybe if I were there I would have a different reaction.

(I have been there once before, and don't remember hearing anything offensive, but I am 20 weeks now, so I guess I'll have a fresh opportunity to review the issue! Also, I do agree that people probably think your belly is larger than it is because the rest of you is so petite and has remained that way.)

Aunt Becky said...

Shockingly, at 35 weeks, no one has said a thing to me. Except for my family, who giggles when I walk into a room. Thankfully, they're also free babysitters, so I can't be too choosy.

I have been getting a lot of "was this one planned?" along with my personal favorite, "You're going to be BUSY."

Gee. Thanks.

alicia said...

boo that the shower turned into a raost, but at least you scroed some loot!

I think you look great, and pregnant! which is awesome! don't let them get you down.

Dawn's Recipes / The Baby Blog said...

Love the starred comment! That's my favorite part. :) I, for one, think you and your belly are totally cute! That girl with the string totally deserves to be slapped around with your yardstick!

Rach said...

Resolutions??? What resolutions? I am just trying to keep Shorty in as long as I can, so I guess that is a resolution. :)

I don't think anyone would blame you if you just wailed on someone the next time you get a rude comment. If they are going to be so stereotypical towards pregnant women, then you should play on the stereo type that pregnant women are overly hormonal and just go to town on someone. :) I think you look great!

Rach said...

Resolutions??? What resolutions? I am just trying to keep Shorty in as long as I can, so I guess that is a resolution. :)

I don't think anyone would blame you if you just wailed on someone the next time you get a rude comment. If they are going to be so stereotypical towards pregnant women, then you should play on the stereo type that pregnant women are overly hormonal and just go to town on someone. :) I think you look great!

JoDee said...

Oh my gosh you totally win! That's so awesome! I think pregnant bellies are deceiving- everyone thinks they look bigger than they actually are- especially if mom is a little on the short size. I think you look fantastic!
Congrats on the hot doctor, by the way! That's got to make your day a little brighter!

areyoukiddingme said...

My strategy was to take the wind out of people's sails before they could say a word. Because everyone starts off with "How are you feeling?" my stock answer was "fat" or "like a whale." This immediately led to a response of "Oh, you're not that big," or "You're pregnant, you're supposed to look that way." I don't think one person ever got in with a remark first. Actually, upon reflection, the only people who called me fat were the doctor and the nurse practitioner - although they called it "measuring big" and was I sure of my dates? Um, yeah, since I had to be medicated my whole first trimester!

The Blonde Duck said...

19 lbs? That's not much at all! Just wait until they all become pregnant or fat and start wrapping strings around them!

Saying hello from SITS!

Lynette said...

Hello fellow SITS-er! I have to say, your photo at 31 weeks is amazing.
I love it. You are a model in it. What a fantastic affirmation of motherhood. Lady your taking off on an amazing journey. Just imagine all the advice your going to get on how to raise these lil ones. Some days it is all you can do to hold your tounge.

Tricia said...

Oh my... That sounds like a day in my world. I just went to back to work after a week and half off.. and the comments were awful. Are you sure it's not twins.. "No azz the 5 sonos might have been wrong.. Maybe I have 6 babies in there?" . I just did a whole post about this too on my blog. I just don't understant why it's okay to call a pg woman fat!!! GRRR...

I would like a turn with your yardstick also!

Kelly said...

Oh my god Jen, you look great. There's is nothing like a pregnant girl. They are just beautiful.

Anonymous said...

Hey Jen, it is Jackie again, I think you look great! If it is any consolation to you I am right behind you at 27 weeks and I have already gained 18 pounds. The difference is where you gain it! I am all ass and hips you know, you have a perfect cupcake belly tell them wh0res to back off!

Greg and Heather said...

This was a hilarious post! And yes YOU WIN :)

http://wondrafulbaby.blogspot.com/

tubal reversal said...

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