And replaced her with a much larger, more alert baby! Or: replaced her with the white baby R. Kelly!
This month has been nothing like I imagined. And don't ask me what I imagined - I had no concept of what a newborn was like, and I had no idea how to care for a newborn.
I am now somewhat schooled on newborn care, but am still surprised that I managed to bring home a 5 pound bag of sugar, keep her alive, and not eat her delicious little feet in one loud NOM.
Being that I had never changed a diaper prior to February 14, 2009, I think I am doing an acceptable job. I've had a lot of practice, since Olivia (R. Kellyepper?) insists on peeing on me at 90% of her diaper changes. Diaper time goes as follows:
-Desitin glob on finger.
-Wipe off Desitin glob.
-Fresh Diaper part deux.
And for extra fun? There have been three times where I went through 4 or 5 diapers at once because just when you think there couldn't be another squirt of poop? THERE TOTALLY IS! MULTIPLE SQUIRTS! AND MAYBE MORE PEE BECAUSE WHY NOT, YOU KNOW?!
I'm sure all babies do their fair share of farting, but I am especially proud of the force with which Olivia can pass gas. Sometimes I have to look at her diaper to see if she burned a hole in it.
Olivia is a sweetheart. Really, she is. She is such a good baby, usually only crying when she is hungry or needs a new diaper. She sleeps pretty well too, which I hesitate to say since the last couple of nights have been particularly challenging. But hopefully it will pass and she will be willing to sleep on her back somewhere other than mommy or daddy's arms. (Please, Olivia? Kthxbye.)
But while I am on the topic, what the hell is the deal with the noisy newborn sleep?! She has started this whole grunting song and dance that lasts all night long. And while I swear she must be awake and pushing out the largest adult turd ever developed, she is sound asleep.
Have we had shitty days where she fusses all day? Yes, yes we have. Olivia and I went to meet her first little friend, Genevieve, who was born a week and a half after Olivia. And wouldn't you know that Olivia either crapped herself or cried for a bottle the entire time we were there. And then we left and she slept for like 7 hours.
You win some, you lose some, right?
The hardest part that I didn't anticipate was the lack of sleep. With Mark working, I am on night shift all the time, and ALL THE LIVE LONG DAY shift, too, during the week. I have been completely unable to nap when it is light out because I feel like I need to do so many things - then I start so many things that don't get finished. I actually sat down this week and tried to remember the last time I actually brushed my teeth, and from the bumpy feel of a tongue swipe, I would guess that it had been at least 8 years.
I'm feeling pretty good, although I'll admit that I wonder if I have postpartum depression - mostly on the nights when I've gotten 2 hours of sleep and can't stop crying when she cries. But then there are 3 or 4 good days in a row, and I feel fine. So that will be something to bring up at my 6 week appointment, I guess.
Today, we went out to eat with the baby for the first time. I was so so worried. It went fine - we went to the Olive Garden with Mark's parents, and Olivia enjoyed 3 ounces of the finest Similac with a dash of Gripe Water (for said grunting) and Mylicon (for said old man farting).
A month of our daughter's life has happened. It feels like we just brought her home! We started out with the tiniest, sleepiest jaundice baby in America. But now there's the wide eyes, the newborn clothes that gulped her up at first now fit adorably, the loose routine that we've developed. We survived diaper rash and a growth spurt that had us making bottles every hour to feed our hungry hungry hippo. We gave our girl her first bath and she loved it. We went shopping, visited family and friends, and ate at a restaurant.
It makes me sad that a month can pass this fast, and I'm trying to stop anticipating the milestones and just enjoy the now. I think that this parenting thing is hard, yet I love Olivia to distraction and the exhaustion is worth it. We waited so long for this baby - THIS baby, OUR baby - and it is unbelievable how everything is different and yet it is still all OK.