Olivia has an Oversized Anywhere Chair.
Its on the top five of favorite things to play with/spill milk on/climb atop/just generally abuse. She does not appreciate if you sit in her anywhere chair. It is clearly labeled with her name, afterall, and it is hard to argue with that sort of "MINE" type of evidence.
But Milo can't read.
I can haz chair?
Like some sort of radar, Olivia senses that a foreign butt has planted on Her Own Anywhere Chair. No toy can distract her. Not even a game of peekaboo or an out of place tub can keep her from staking her claim.
Oh no he di'nt...
Move it or lose it, dog.
I feel like we are getting dangerously close to being required to actually...parent. Which I find to be terrifying. Up until now, I've been pretty comfortable with the whole Keep Alive part of being a mom.
Block the dog food so she can't choke? No problem.
Close the toilet lid so she isn't tempted to dunk her ahead and attempt a self-swirly? Check.
Break food up into little pieces so they are easier to chew, and to throw on the floor? Double Check.
I'm doing a terrible job at teaching her the meaning of No. Or, maybe just that No is not hilarious. She's well aware of the meaning of No. It clearly means: do something not allowed, pause when the mother says no, smile one-tooth smile at the mother, carry on. Bonus if the mother laughs at the baybee because OMFG SHE IS BAD AND SHE ACTS JUST LIKE MEEEEEE HOW CUTE AND MUSHY! LOLZ WITH MY HAND OVER MY MOUTH.
So, my point is that Milo should get used to not sitting in Olivia's Anywhere Chair. Because there is a good chance that I will suck at the Sharing lesson, too.
Also. You people seem well-read. So please tell me: what toddler-related books should I be reading? I loved Happiest Baby on the Block, and the Baby Whisperer.
What's good for scheming against an adorably sinister toddler?
One Year Ago: Well Played, Universe. Well Played.
Two Years Ago: March 18, 2006