But this giveaway was easy to enter - just leave a comment! Well. I'm a piss poor commenter. I must have felt ambitious that day or whatever, but I left a comment and I'm so glad I did.
I won a six week session with a life coach.
What exactly does a life coach do? I had no idea. From what I gather, in a nutshell, a life coach helps you reach a goal. Whatever goal you decide on. The life coach helps you work through the kinks so that you can do whatever you're trying to do.
This is good for me. This is potentially disastrous for her. Heidi is her name, and her website is To Be Luminous. I want to make sure to tell you this because I know that you all Pity The Fool who has to deal with me and my neuroses for the next six weeks in 45 minute intervals. She lives in Prague now but plans to move back to the US in June.
I'm afraid I will change her mind, is all I'm saying.
I suck so thoroughly at life lately. I feel like I'm in a constant sprint and even when I have free time I can't get caught up because my ass is drawn to my couch like some sort of enormous magnet. It's not that I'm really unorganized. That's not true. I have lots of help from Mark. I'm just busy and kind of being a baby about it.
As a matter of fact, it took me two weeks to schedule a time to speak with her. Because, you know, typing a two sentence email and hitting send is just way too much for my delicate psyche. And then to think of what I want to work on? Really?
This required pulling my head out of my own ass.
My only actual workable idea was to be more healthy. I eat like shit 50% of the time, and then spend the other 50% of the time eating healthy and wondering why my pants are too tight. I do exercise, but it really means nothing when I'm shoving a super sized fry into my mouth and daydreaming about a large DQ Blizzard for dessert.
So for the next six weeks, every Saturday morning, Heidi gets to listen to me babble on about my various neuroses in an attempt to help me make better food choices, exercise, and just generally be a more healthy person. My accountability partner. I'd love to lose 5 pounds, but I'm trying to focus on being healthy instead of feeling skinny.
But skinny would be nice, wouldn't it?
Also. I'm planning to be stuffed full of frozen embryos sometime soon, and I think a lower weight and good workout routine will help with The Diabeetus. I'm sure I'll still have it because God Hates Me but maybe I will be able to drink milk and eat fruit this time without falling to the floor into a diabetic coma.
And since I know you've all been missing Wilford Brimley, here you go:
Diabeetus! Diabeetus! Diiiiiiiaaaaaabeeeeetuuuuuus!
One Year Ago: The End of the World As We Know It
Two Years Ago: Infertility Pants