Friday, May 7, 2010

George Costanza Would Be Distraught

Because Worlds Were Colliding yesterday!

I ordered my drugs for my frozen embryo transfer.  Well, the nurse at the Cleveland Clinic Fertility Center ordered my drugs for my frozen embryo transfer.  I just ate a king-sized Hershey bar and contemplated the inner workings of the people on The Hills.  But either way: drugs, they wuz ordered.

Not sure how I feel about jumping back into the stirrups.  Besides, you know, being really excited to show people my Lady Business on the regular.  I'm all twisty turny about it in a way that is needlessly dramatic and doesn't warrant further description than Poor Me And All My Options: A Drama.

But anyway.  Worlds. Colliding. 

It turns out that the new pharmacy for the spermically challenged?  Requires a signature for drug delivery.  Which is awesome.  I mean, I wouldn't want any of my neighbors stealing my 1.5 inch progesterone in oil needles and stabbing themselves in the asses!  That fun is MINE and I refuse to share because I'm just a total bitch like that. 

The helpful lady at the pharmacy suggested I send my package to work and so I did.  Because really, the only people who sign for Fed Ex are the people who know about my Adventures In Infertility And Moron Management. 

But of course that can't work out in my favor, because on the one day that I choose to have a big ass box of fertility medications shipped to me at work?  The very one and only day that this would ever happen?  MY BOSS signs for the Fed Ex.  For, like, the first time in his 27 years with our company.

I didn't see it, but apparently he read the address label and said, "says it's for Jen...wonder what it is?" Then, he shook it all around near his ear.  Trying to figure out what it was.

WORLDS: THEY BE COLLIDING UP IN HERE * kaboom *

I mean, the only way it could have been more George Constanza is if a PIO needle poked through the box and stabbed him in the eyeball causing me to make up some outrageous lie.

FML.

(Please tell me that you remember the whole worlds colliding thing from Seinfeld?  Here's a refresher.)

24 comments:

kimbosue said...

Oh Lordy! Only you Jenneper, only you.

But YAY for Round 2!

Mrs. Higrens said...

Buwahahahah.

areyoukiddingme said...

Giant Hershey bar...mmmm!

You should start getting all kinds of weird (highly personal) stuff sent to work. It could be a test - an experiment to see if your boss is naturally drawn to packages that could be embarassing for you. Could be fun...

strongblonde said...

oh crap. i need to update myself on some hills action!

laughed out loud at this post. ....and also started wondering if i would ever make it to FET. i have no idea. just living day to day right now. :)

B and i usually bring seinfeld into our conversations at least a few times a week. i totally appreciated this :)

Laura said...

congrats on heading into round 2! very excited to see how things go for you as a mommy to 2. btw, i don't think i've ever commented but i friggin love your blob. i always have to muffle my laughter in my cube to try to prevent my co workers from thinking i'm insane. ahahaha.

Laura said...

and by blob i mean blog. blobs are cool too tho.

Jersey Beth said...

Looks like we will be cycling together. I start Lupron on Wednesday, 5/12 for (first) FET.

I'll be keeping my fingers crossed for both of us!!

Beth
Bethchev2@aol.com

stephanie said...

Awesome. As if there isn't ENOUGH drama surrounding this shit, you now have your boss all up in it.

Good luck on the FET. I'm gearing up to make the call to schedule our next fresh IVF. Everytime I get halfway through the number, I get queasy and hang up.

I can't imagine why. It's such a PLEASURABLE memory and experience.

kim said...

Ahh - this reminds me of the time I had to have a tank of sperm sent to my work. Do you know how big those are? About the size of a standard vacuum cleaner.

We're gearing up for our FET too. I'll start BCPs not this week but next. This is pretty much our last shot at another sibling for our IVF miracles. I'm very scared of the emotional side effects if this doesn't work.

When is your transfer?

Michelle said...

haha, that episode of Seinfeld was just on last night! "A George, divided against itself cannot stand!" hahaha cracks me up!

brunettebeachgirl said...

Hmm... I know the feeling of the anxiety, not the whole 'my boss is all up in my vag business'. I'm in the 2ww of HELL and 9dpo a big fat negative to greet me this morning.

FUCK THIS SUCKS!!!


Good luck though... lol. : )

ks said...

Hah! Hah! That is something that would totally happen to me! Glad to hear I'm not alone!

Yahhh!!! You're getting ready for an FET! That's great news! All the best to you JenPepper!

Jamie said...

I remember it. So funny.

leahjane8 said...

Man, you crack me up. So glad that there are others out there who still use Seinfeld references. Good luck with trying again!!

Tasha said...

Oh, I agree - all future packages MUST be sent to work, the more personal the better, in fact, order random weird stuff just for the fun factor - but PLEASE install a webcam first! Best of luck on your FET, I am 30 weeks with my FET twins from only 3 frozen eggs transferred - the recomendation to get one healthy baby :)

Dora said...

Good luck with your FET! Frozen cycles are so much easier. My former totcicle rocks! :-)

Rebecca said...

You are so so funny. Lady Business....ha ha

Parsing Nonsense said...

I feel obligated to tell you that one of your Google ads says, and I'm not even kidding you: "Poop Eating Dogs On Sale".

Anyway, sorry about the necessity of the stirrups, but congrats on getting ready to make another baby!

Katherine said...

Better not let your boss give Olivia reading lessons. Or she'll learn to pronounce "fraglie" like "please shake me as hard as you can!"
Hmm, if FET baby comes to the office... better not be wearing a shirt that reads the same :)

Good luck with your FET!

Katherine said...

Maybe Kim can have a package delivered to your work :)

tvgirl_nicole said...

Someone just suggested your blog to me when I told her I was nervous about starting my first round of IVF in July. It's nice to find someone who's been/is still in the trenches.
Best of luck to you!

Alyssa said...

This is so exciting! Okay, not the part where you get to stab yourself with hormones, but the rest of it is exciting.

Anonymous said...

Worlds collliding. Classic Seinfeld.

As a young, single, 20-something gal living alone in the big city, I once had a, um, sensitive (and VERY personal.... wink wink) package delivered to my workplace. I figured a discreetly-wrapped small package with my name on it wouldn't seem so weird arriving at the Recieving dock that signs for a warehouse full if products. Still, on the day it arrived, someone from the warehouse actually took the time to walk it into the offices and through the maze of cubicles to deliver it to my desk. I came back from lunch to find my new, er, faux-boyfriend, waiting for me on my chair. Who knows if anyone shook it, but all seals were still intact. Phew. BIG Phew.

Kahla said...

I swear, you could not make that shit up if you tried! Ha!

Good luck on the FET, we have not done one yet cause our first four IVFs never produced any totsicles (which would have saved a buttload of money, but hey, who's counting) and yet our fifth IVF that worked and meant we didn't need totsicles did... of course. Anyway, I hear you don't have to share your ladybusiness quite as much (hope that doesn't disappoint you or anything, I'm sure you REALLY enjoy that part - I know I do).