HA! No. This story is more interesting than that, but only in a vague way.
So I was standing in the produce aisle trying to find some unmoldy strawberries (FAIL), which was surprisingly difficult. And this couple comes up beside me. Which I hate. People should avoid my general vicinity at all times - I'm thinking about getting one of those giant board signs to wear over my shoulders when I am out but I can't decide what it should say.
The wife says, "OH! BLACKBERRIES! Let's see how they taste!"
OK. I am a deadly combination of socially inept and hateful, so forgive me if tasting the produce is a perfectly acceptable behavior. But I was totally irritated and since I wear my hate directly on my face, I was all * grimace-y * in her direction.
Her husband, sensing my * grimace-y-ness, * makes eye contact with me, and shamefully lowers and shakes his head. Like, "can you even believe this? Can you even believe that I have to share a bed with this produce whore?"
Now, I'm fine with opening the little carton of berries and looking around for mold/bug/dirt/dollah billz. But tasting the food? Where do you draw the line? Because you never know if the first one you taste is the ONLY good one in the carton, so then do you taste, like, half of the carton and calculate the average deliciousness? Squared? Times five divided by pi? WHERE DOES IT END, PEOPLE?!
I watched this lady taste a blackberry from six boxes before she walked away without buying any berries. And? AND? AND!!!!!!!!! She said, "mmmmmmm" every time she ate a berry, so you know those fuckers tasted good.
Please tell me: is this appropriate Produce Etiquette? Would the Emily Post of Produce approve of such behavior?