The problem is that I'm just not very nice. I mean, I could work on it. But I'm not really that interested in being a better person. I'm not mean, really, but I'm just not nice.
Sometimes I use my iPhone to annoy people who annoy me. It's only fair. For example, this old guy would not stop staring at me in the mall. I tried everything. I smiled and looked away. I stared at him with my best "STOP LOOKING AT ME SWAN" look until my eyes dried out. I made a strange face at him. What else is a girl to do but whip out her iPhone and take a very obvious picture.
|Hey! Your tanning bed called! They said you have a fucking staring problem!|
On the other hand, I sometimes use my iPhone to photograph people who have done absolutely nothing to annoy me. Except that they exist. In this case, I have to be more covert. Luckily, I disabled the shutter sound on my phone so that I can be a total asshole and take a photo under the ruse of texting.
I recently caught this gem at the same mall. This lady did nothing to annoy me, aside from getting dressed and being in my line of vision: mid-fifties, tight Aeropostale sweat shirt, Ed Hardy sweat pants, and CROCS.
And then I died. The end.
|Ed Fardy? Ed Tardy?|
Your buttcrack will be eating your douchey sweatpants while you enjoy your sandwich.
I should just stop going to the mall.
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