Thursday, June 16, 2011

You're going to think I'm making this up.

I started this post last week and never had a chance to publish.  So, here you go - a week later and I still feel like I have a stress hangover...

Tuesday night I was up sick all night.  Barfy sick.  I woke up just long enough to call off work and hand Olivia over to gramma and papa before I slept until 4 p.m.

Oh, yes.  And also?  I called and found out that Ainsley had pneumonia.

Thursday I felt decent enough to go back to work.  So I did.  And then after work I went to visit Ainsley.  While I was at the hospital, I got a text from Mark:

"Liv is having a seizure."

So then Olivia had a big ass febrile seizure and Mark called 911.  And instead of taking her to Children's, they insisted on taking her to the closest shit ass no idea how to deal with children ER despite our protests.

By the time I drove the 30 minutes from Children's to the ER to see Olivia, they were already arranging to have her transported.  To Children's.

AND THEN we spent two nights at the hospital for...a virus.  Olivia came home Saturday night happy and demanding to watch Toy Story.

BUT WAIT!  THERE'S MORE!  So then Mark went to visit Ainsley early this morning and while he was holding her he noticed that she was acting strange.  Her hand kept twitching and her thumb was clamped down and he couldn't move it.

Because...She was having a motherfucking seizure!

OH MY GOD YOU GUYS.  I'd love to write more but I am way busy hanging padding on every wall in my house so that I can commence necessary insane behavior.  I'd say send cookies, but I have 30 pounds to lose so send spanx I guess.

81 comments:

Vaso said...

Omg!!! Big Hugs... I don't know what to say. Hoping and praying everything will go back to normal soon...

*Brandi* said...

Oh I can't belive what you're going through. I hope both girls are feeling better, you're feeling better and things start getting a little less stressful.

Hugs

Sarah S said...

That is crazy!!!!

I am saying prayers for your family!!!

Mrs.Joe said...

At least you have your humor still. Maybe all of this trouble now will mean that your girls will be angels when they're teens. Praying for your family still!

MNgal said...

Holy cow! I'm sorry that you've had all that going on. I give you permission to eat cookies. That's the only logical coping solution. Hope everyone is feeling back to normal!

Nic said...

OMG I am so sorry for everything you guys are going through. Pleased that Olivia is doing Ok now though.
x

Whitney said...

No kidding, you can't make this stuff up. SERIOUSLY. Praying for ya'll. And yes... eat the cookies.

pintucks said...

Okay seriously. Screw the spanx. Cookies. A LOT OF COOKIES. Dipped in vodka.

Am so sorry things are so hard right now. Thinking of you...

Christy.

Babydreams2011 said...

Praying for BOTH of your babies and you and dh! You are stronger than words can express.. {{HUGS}}

ASP said...

Unbelievable. I'm so sorry that you're having to deal with a million things at once. Your family is always in my thoughts and prayers. Hang in there...

fiscafamily said...

What the f'ing Christ???!!!

Delurking here cause I just can't take this in silence anymore!

This is enough!! I personally have and enough and I'm not even you guys!!

For the love of all things good in this universe-to include your sanity, your homes interior decor and for those of us readers who just need to see that every now and then the good guys aren't being kicked to shit while they are down again, and again, and again, and again...
We need this to stop. I'd say I'm praying for you guys-but that's not even really it anymore-I am actually demanding that the universe (and maybe even threatening it at the same time-so an angry demand) that the tide changes-and immediately!

Milla said...

I share the incredulity, this is totally unbelievable and terrible. It can't keep pouring on you all like this, it just can't. If there is anything I can do, other than be incredulous at the end of a keyboard please let us all know. Very glad Olivia is home and well and poor Ainsley, the girl has guts. Nobody could deny you as much insane behaviour as you feel like, insane-away, you have to keep going somehow. Sending love to you all.

Mrs. Higrens said...

Do virtual cookies have calories? Even if they do, you SO deserve them.

Those girls of yours will be the least drama filled teenagers ever because they've gotten it all out of the way early.

Many, many, many hugs!

HereWeGoAJen said...

This is getting ridiculous. I mean, before, it was ridiculous, but this is even more ridiculous. Sigh. I hope this is the end of the drama. I'm sending lots of love your way.

Aimee said...

Oh. My. GOD. What on earth are you supposed to do at this point?!

Do they know why Ainsley had a seizure? Do they even know why Olivia has them? Dear lord can they FIX IT?

I am thinking and praying for you because holy cow...no one should have to go through this.

Amy said...

I echo what everyone else has said. Thinking of you and Mark and hoping that you are close to the light at the end of the tunnel.

PS My word verification is ledricss...almost thought it said ludicris

Jen said...

Damn. Just damn. Cookies dipped in vodka and filled with pot. I guess?? Just trying to be helpful, you know? Cuz I got nothing over here. I REALLY hope things look up for y'll. I think of your family often.

dahliah said...

I'm so, so sorry you are going through this. Thinking of you and your family. Your girls are beautiful.

lparsons15 said...

Holy Crap...I hope you all recover and get better ASAP...

DonnaZ said...

INSANE! Can you have a possible Tequila hangover anytime soon cause you need it! Prayers to the babies and you guys!

Dave said...

No. Freaking. Way! That'd be way too much to handle in a month, much less a couple days.

I came across your blog a couple weeks ago. You've been in my thoughts and prayers ever since.

Kristal said...

No. Freaking. Way! That'd be way too much to handle in a month, much less a couple days.

I came across your blog a couple weeks ago. You've been in my thoughts and prayers ever since.

Mandy Hornbuckle said...

Oh you guys, I'm so sorry.

Allison said...

Holy shit. You couldn't make this stuff up. Sending you guys prayers.

Amy said...

Could I send vodka? Or the alcoholic beverage of your choice? Because if I were you at this point, I would be a raging alcoholic. The week my daughter was hospitalized for the same thing as your Olivia, I had a miscarriage as well. I dealt with that whole shitstorm (which also included pneumonia for my daughter) by getting wasted and playing MarioCart with my husband. It was fun. I actually laughed, and it sounds like you could use a laugh.

Plus, if you get drunk enough? You'll piss off like 4lbs of water.

B. Wilson said...

Bananas.

Can't. freaking. believe. this.

After all you guys have been through and continue to go through. Awful.

Deanna said...

Oh no. :( I'm sorry!

The Zoo said...

Thinking of you.

hairyfarmerfamily said...

Christ, that's a bad week, Jen. Lets not have any more of those. And I echo the vodka-dipped cookies; it's not the time to worry about the poundage.

Courtney said...

I'm so so sorry...that is just seriously way too much for one family to handle. Sending prayers your way.

Anita said...

I hope the girls get better soon. Stay strong girl, and lean on those closest to you for support.

clearness said...

There is this line in the book The Middle Place by Kelly Corrigan where she's frustrated by many different medical trauma's within her family and she said that she just wanted to go into the garage and not open the garage door and start the car and move it forward and backward all while slamming into the walls and pissing herself the whole time. Just reading that one part made me feel better when I was going through some B.S. medical crap.

((hugs))

noswimmers said...

What.The.Fuck. Seriously how much shit can one person be given? Ugh. You and your family don't deserve this. I'm hoping that everything turns around soon and you don't have to see a hospital for a LONG ASS time.
xoxo

A New Beginning said...

For you, I will give the universe a swift kick in its ass and ask WTF???? Why you guys?

To you and your family, I will send hugs and prayers. I hope everyone is recuperating.

M said...

I am so sorry to hear this. I've been following this blog for a few months but have read every single post, you were the first blog I followed, and just adore it. If I knew your address/po box I would send spanx AND cookies, because after the week you've had you deserve a cookie, or 20. I am so so so sorry Jen, and we are ALL here for you, sending e-hugs and well wishes. Your probably the nicest person I have ever "met" and for this to happen is just horrible.

raisingmiles said...

Holy Shit with the seizing genes already. Dammit. Can't ANY of your kids catch a break!

Superstar said...

You know, because you don't have enough shit to deal with. I really hope the universe backs the fuck off, at least long enough for you to catch your breath.

Hang in there, chickadee, though that is a mighty request. If I send cookies and promise that they're fat and calorie free, you can eat all you want.

Amelia said...

Sending healing thoughts and visions of lite cookies.

Pinky said...

All I have to say is WOW! I really do hope things turn around for you guys.

Ashley said...

Oh my gosh! You guys have been through more than I can even fathom. Thinking of your girls and family and hoping things turn around quickly.

Jill said...

I don't know you, and I haven't even followed you for very long, but I'm in tears reading. This is too much. You should not have to go through all of this. I'm so sorry for all you're having to endure. I will be praying for your family. God owes you big time.

Ryan & Amber said...

Oh my! Poor girls...poor YOU. Praying and hugs!

Courtney said...

man, and to think by the title that I was sure you were going to tell us that you were pregnant. Boy, was I off. I'm sorry, this is a stinker of a situation (and that's keeping it 'G' rated, I know there are other adjectives probably going through your mind more descriptive than 'stinker')

sheilah said...

Man that so sucks. I just wanna shout to the universe to leave you guys alone!!!

afeeleys said...

Geeze, you just can't catch a break! Poor babies, hope it gets better soon!

PJ said...

You deserve the bestest, most fanatstic, wonderfulest things to happen from THIS moment on, because as far as karma goes... you're due some!!!

Overdue.

I'm so sorry Jen. Things have just GOT to get better.

Carol said...

Forget the cookies. Just drink. Heavily.

Bekah said...

Holy crap, could you possibly get a freaking break?! Much love from over here. Things have got to get better soon, right? I'm pretty sure you're due for it.

Gabrielle said...

I can only send thoughts that things will get better soon...really, how can they get worse? Take care of yourself! You are doing a wonderful job taking care of your girls!

Crazy Sister said...

That's insanse. The things you are going through for your gorgeous girls!

Suz said...

Oh no! So sorry!

Jeremy said...

wow.
just, wow.

areyoukiddingme said...

Fuuuuuck. Well, I'm hoping this is the climax to the drama, and the rest of your life is one easy, breezy glide downhill.

Thinking of you all...

Momma Kelli said...

Wow, that does sound like something out of a movie. If only it was... So sorry to hear. I hope the padding is extra good! I don't really know what else to say except I'm sorry & I hope things return back to your "normal." I read your blog faithfully and while I don't post much, I think of you and your family & say a little prayer for you all.

Lise said...

Wow. Sending lots of good thoughts and vibes your way.

Erin said...

Wow. As my Dad says anytime something really awful happens... THAT IS JUST BULLSHIT. Of course, this? Is total FUCKING bullshit.

You must have the worlds biggest catchers mitt, though, because you are catching absolutely everything the cosmos is throwing at you. Wait - I realize that might sound bad, but catchers WANT to catch things. It means they are not losing control of what is coming their way. Even when they think a ball has gotten past them, they can be surprised that the ball is right there, in their mitt.

You might feel like all hell has broken loose, and far ne it from me to tell you it hasn't... but I'll bet if you look in your mitt, you will find you still have the ball.

Take care of you, Jen! Eat, drink (water first, then alcohol), stretch and don't forget to breathe. In a battle of you vs. shitstorm the cosmos is throwing at you, I would bet the house on you.

Leila said...

I am so SORRY this is all happening to you! Please,try to take care of yourself. Screw the pounds and eat the damn cookies. Drink a pitcher of chocolate martinis to wash them down. You've earned it. I am sending every extra ounce of sanity I can spare your way.

Kahla said...

I agree, eat the cookies a drink whole milk to wash them down... or something stronger! I cannot even fathom going through what you already have, and the fact it just keeps coming... ugh. Sending lots of prayers!

Stephanie said...

I'm so sorry! It's got to end soon, right? Thinking good thoughts for you and the entire family.

kharris said...

For Heaven's sakes! Once you get these girls home and together they are going to owe you and your husband diamonds and cruise ship vacations on every Mother's and Father's day for the rest of your lives! Stressful little buggers! Bless them both and all of you. You're doing great - hang in there and know you have lots of prayers and good thoughts from all of us!

Andrea said...

I never comment but have been following your blog for a while. I just want you to know that I'm so sorry you have to go through all of this. I hope your beautiful daughters heal and recovery quickly.
I guess I just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you.

Parsing Nonsense said...

Oh my gosh, that is so unfair. Sending love and hugs your way.

Lela said...

Wow, I get totally knocked on my ass just by getting the stomach flu, let alone all this other drama! You're seriously super mom. I wish there was something I could do for you, but I don't know where your number, or where you live, or oh wait, you! But if it means anything, a stranger sends positive thoughts you way surprisingly often.

Michele said...

I'm going to the post office today to mail you a f*cking break - sounds like you need one (or a few). Hang in there!!!

alicia said...

It can't possibly get worse, can it? My god Jen, you have the strength of 12 thousand men.

I bow down to you. I am not worthy.
Thinking of the four of you.

Shannon said...

Don't know you personally, obviously, but enough is enough. Just donated $20 via your friend's blog. You can put it towards Spanx. Or cookies. You decide.

Hold in there. <3

Lori said...

I too have never commented before bu wanted to tell you today that I follow your blog, am continually thinking good and healing thoughts for Ainsley and your whole family and that I really admire you. Your honesty and humor in the face of hideousness is incredibly inspiring.

Emily said...

I was starting to worry because I hadn't heard from you in a while. I'm glad everyone is more or less okay. I'll be sending you all my good thoughs, okay?

Stacey said...

My verification word: bonspa. Yes my dear, you deserve a good spa. More than anyone I've ever known.

Laura said...

the title of this post caught my eye on my BlogHer side bar....because so often, I feel like people must think I am making up the crap that happens to me.
but...

YOU WIN.

wow.

God clearly sent me here...you see, I just got back from my oldest childs baseball game, where a dog bit my youngest son..in his THROAT...and I have been a shaking, crying mess...

and then I saw the TITLE of your blog...
and then I read your post...
and you ended with SPANX, and that made me laugh..

and I am just so thankful for your great sense of humor in such a terrific storm...
you handle your life beautifully...I am so intrigued and inspired by just this one post...

I am sorry for this crap you didn't make up.

prayers for you and your family...

Dora said...

Damn, Jen! This is Just. Too. Much.

I'm so sorry you guys just can't seem to catch a break. To hell with the spanx, you just keep on self medicating with cookies until Ainsley is home with her big sister and breathing on her own. Sending love your way.

Rachel said...

Wow. Here's hoping everything gets resolved, your stress level decreases, and your lovely little ladies stay healthy and seizure-free! In lieu of cookies, would you like a random little tidbit of information to puzzle on when you need a second of mental escape? Here it is: your site is inaccessible from Tibet. I was there in February, and I wanted to check in and see how you were doing, so I jumped on the hotel wifi in Lhasa and entered your web address, but no dice. I knew that some news outlets and many blogs on blogspot and some on wordpress would be inaccessible, because China is currently occupying Tibet and restricts internet access, but I had no idea that your radical awesomeness presented such a threat to the Chinese government that they would block your site from the (not so) average infertile American tourist chilling in Lhasa. I guess they, like me, realize that you would make a most excellent and charismatic leader for an uprising of women who have had it up to HERE with the stupids, and so they have rightly learned to fear you. Rock on with your bad self, striking terror into the hearts of Chinese Internet Censors.

Leah said...

Praying for you and your family. Your sense of humor is still intact, and moments like these call for all things chocolate forget the spanx.

DF said...

Just so truly f-ing unbelievable. Two children who don't live in the same house gets a virus and both has seizures?? WTF?? I just don't know what to say.

Eat some cookies NOW!!

Tarah said...

Oh my gosh - how horrible! I'll send gum - I chop on gum like a cow chewing cud when I'm stressed out. Plus no weight gain from it.

Rob and Sara plus 1 plus 1 more said...

I think about you and your family every day and hope every day that things will get better. I pray they will. I have had a crazy year (not as crazy as yours) and I just keep laughing or else I will go ape shit on all the wrong people. Praying that you have a magical turn around soon.

Heather said...

I'm so sorry you are going through all this. I'm praying everyone is healthy and happy very very soon.

notmensa said...

OMG! Your blog is amazing. I'm praying for you (all the way from Australia!!) every day until you update...

Jen said...

This is one of those moments when my mother would (unwisely) say something like, "Well just remember, God never gives us more than we can manage." And I would reply something like, "God is obviously on crack this week." --- So I'm not gonna say God never gives you more than you can handled, and I will gladly punch in the face anyone who says something like this to you.

Also, I'm not going to tell you to keep the faith, hang in there, or tell you the sun will come out tomorrow. When your babies are sick, there's always at least one moment when you are confident the sun will NOT come out tomorrow. When you're sick too, there is no sun. There is only your head in the toilet.

So, don't hang in there or keep the faith. Eat some cookies. With ice cream on top. Do it for me, because I don't have an excuse to eat what I want right now. You have every right to eat your weight in desserts right now. I "pitythefoo" who tries to suggest you should NOT eat desserts in excess during this season of your life.

Seriously..... seizures..... ridiculous. God needs to lay off of you.

Laurel said...

Oh, Jen. I want so much for Ainsley to be better and home. I can't even imagine what it feels like for you. And universe? Please to lay off Olivia as well, while you're at it.

Thinking of you, and wishing I had something better to offer than that.

Annie Harper said...

I know you will most likely never read this seeing as how I am the 81st commenter...but I just wanted to say that I think you are incredible, truly. I don't know you, but I know enough to think you are stronger than I could ever hope to be, whether you feel strong right now or not. I wish so badly that there was something more I could do for you other than leave you a comment telling you I will be praying for you and your family. I feel like you have amazing things coming your way because, really, there'd BETTER be.