Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Hi, how are you? Oh, wait. I do not care.

Dear Every Fast Food Place,

Please stop forcing your employees to ask me how I am doing.

1. I'm hungry and lazy and therefore, buying your shitty food.

2. They don't care how I'm doing and make it painfully obvious.

3. I don't care at all how they are doing but feel like I have to ask and then pretend to care and OMG I HATE AWKWARD SOCIAL INTERACTION.

4. (for Chick-fil-a only) You can only say, "My Pleasure" so many times before it starts to sound dirty.

Let's just all mutually agree to barely tolerate each other for the sake of unhealthy food, clogged arteries, and obesity.

Kthxbai.

25 comments:

Sally said...

Oh my god, AGREED. The worst is the lady at Wendy's who always says "See you tomorrow!"
Yes, I will be here again tomorrow, and we both know that, but can't we just leave open the possibility that I will eat a vegetable instead?

Angie said...

Yep, Chik Fil A and there "it'll be my pleasure to serve you at the window" crap always makes me laugh!

areyoukiddingme said...

Dude, they ARE seriously concerned about your health and welfare. If you stop eating their food, they might lose their job. And you are concerned about their health and welfare, because if they've got the flu, you want to know about that.

Elizabeth said...

I'm married to someone who actually converses with people at the drive-thru. It's sweet, but also awkward. He'll say "I'm great! How are you?" And then? He pauses for them to answer. I'm always elbowing him going "Dude, order our food. No one gives a sh--"

Also, CFA employees, despite sounding dirty have been shocked whenever I ask for honey with my breakfast. Twice now they've said "Pardon?" Or "I thought you were calling me honey." Really? My pleasure. LOL

Lizmari said...

hahahahahaaaaa... it's been a while since I've eaten at one of these places, but I often think of this when I go anywhere... Especially banks! Our local Wells Fargo, man... they ask the SAME forced questions every Friday! lol Like these fake, long conversations, on "what are you doing over the weekend...?" -- "I'm spending all the money I just deposited in here, what do you think? Leave me alone!" LOL

Michelle said...

Thank you for this post!!! I feel bad enough going to these places and I want to be as anonymous as possible. Don't try to socialize with me! I am also pregnant and a few weeks ago I went to McD's. I ordered a meal and made it a large. That's all I ordered. The guy said "Wow, you must be hungrey!" First of all, just punch my order into your computer and be done with it. Second, ALL I ordered was a meal with a bigger drink and fries. I didn't order 3 apple pies and a shamrock shake. Then you can question my hunger. My response was "Yes, hungry and pregnant."

Inara Jones said...

Amen, Sister. I hate that.

Of course, I am anti-small-talk in all situations. It's such a waste of time.

Rebecca said...

So maybe you can go in and start asking some awkward questions just to be silly?

Really word verification? 37.863 alectury numbers and a decimal and letters with a space....This is crazy.

CSB said...

Omg, how can you be so funny and nail it every time! I am just LOLing all over the place.

I have been going to Wendy's 1x/week during my pregnancy and aftewards - for basically over a year now. Can't beat their Spicy Chicken filet combo! But I stopped going FINALLY and lost 5 lbs. in 3 weeks without even trying! I was so sad to realize what Wendy's was doing to me!

CJ said...

YEP!! Chick fil A needs to stop!! LOL!

Solitary Diner said...

This is why I always go to drive thrus. Sadly, I will sometimes order two "entrees" for myself (because who can decide between fillet-o-fish and mcnuggets?), and then I feel like I need to supersize my order so that I can give the illusion of splitting the fries and drink with someone at home. Yep, healthy eating at its best.

HereWeGoAJen said...

I hate talking to strangers. I just mutter fine and order my food.

Steph said...

YES to the Chik-fil-a thing! There's one near me that I used to go to (very) frequently for an ice cream cone. One of the guys who works there asked my name once, and I was so flustered that I told him. Now every time I go there he's like "Hi, Steph! How are you?" and all friendly-like. It is SERIOUSLY CREEPY.

Jem said...

You crack me up!

thebabywife said...

*spits out tea with laughter*

thebabywife said...

*spits out tea with laughter*

Korndog said...

Oh man Jack in the Box is the worst!! Just as they give me my food and I'm ready to drive away they ask "and how was your service today?". I don't want to sit there and have a conversation with them after they already gave me my food! I'm not going to lie, I've pretended to not hear then and drive away several times. Haha.

BU said...

Ewww I hate thanking CFA people. The people at the gas station near my house always say stuff like "what are you up to today?" "How's your day so far?" etc. Come on people, you really don't give a shit and I don't really want to tell you that I just barely got out of my pajamas to come get a diet coke.

K_Dot said...

I thought I was the only one who thought that way about the "My Pleasure" thing at Chick-fil-A. So glad I am not alone :o)

erin said...

sooooooo true. So very true. :)

Adrianne said...

Chick-fil-a creeps me out.

"My pleasure" should be reserved for special occasions like when your boss asks you to get him coffee. *cough *gag

Clair said...

I can't stand it at Sonic when they say "It was an honor to serve you today." Really? My $2.14 transaction for a cherry limeade just made your day huh? As long as no one bites my head off and they get my order done quickly, oh, and it happens to be correct, that all I need!

Hope said...

And can they please not give me a receipt for my dollar menu fries and burger? I really don't need the evidence in my console.

Alison said...

Yes, dear CFA, I thought you were supposed to be all Christian and stuff, so why do you lie?? It is not your pleasure, it is your job. Lies make the baby Jesus cry.

Although, really I'm just angry that I can't frequent your establishment any longer since you don't support the gays. My pleasure!

kouklaville said...

I just sat, ignored, fed, put to bed, and sucessfully ignored my husband come home as I read your ENTIRE BLOG!! Ohmygosh you have been thru the RINGER and I am glued to your life, your trials, your baby in the nicu and how honest your blog is..

Your life has been a roller coaster and I know what you mean by "I dont know how you do it"..life REQUIRES us to "DO IT". I get it, I think you are awesome..I am addicted to your story..I have cheered for your positive preg. test with baby #1, sat in horror as you lost your babys heart beat the NIGHT BEFORE C-Section..and the battle of the past year..and years to come...

I am just amazed that your story continues..and I am reading...